Will You Ignore Warning Signs?

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"Hello ma'am! I am Dave. I was blessed by your ministration today." Dave said to Martha, his fiancee in his usual joking manner.

"Thank you sir, all glory to God. " She replied in the same manner.

Dave and Martha had been an item in their church for four months now. Dave was the youth leader while Martha was one of the lead singers in the choir.

Dave noticed Martha on one Sunday when she took his favourite song at the moment, the way she took the song touched his heart.

He asked few people about her and they confirmed she was an active member of the choir even though she was new.

The second time he saw her was during a workers' meeting. She was gorgeously dressed and she looked absolutely beautiful.

That day after the meeting, he approached her and showed his interest in being her friend. She said it was OK and they became friends.

Martha joined the church about three months earlier. She just moved to the town where the church was located. She was transferred from her workplace. This came as a saving grace to her because she had just come out of a bad relationship and she needed a change in environment to help her forget the past, as her ex worked in the same company with her. So the transfer was just what she needed.

After about two weeks, of going to different churches, she finally discovered the church where Dave attended. She was at peace in her spirit and she decided to be a member.

Martha wasn't one who would not be active in church. She was always very involved especially in the choir. She decided to join the choir and put in her all and not long after, everyone noticed her commitment.

Martha was also willing to make new friends. She was 26 and was ready to mingle despite the bad relationship she had been. She had always thought it was because she met her ex at a party. Probably someone from the church would treat her better. No surprise she was willing to be friends with Dave without much persuasion.

Soon after they became friends, Dave decided to take their relationship to the next level. He had seen everything he wanted in a wife in Martha so he proposed to her.

Martha was surprised by how quickly things happened but she didn't mind. She would be 27 soon and Dave didn't seem like a bad person, she said yes...

They went to see their pastor who advised them to take some time to get to know each other better.

Some weeks after they became an item, something not too pleasant happened.

They were to go on a date, the plan was for Dave to pick Martha up at a popular junction after which he'll drive them down to the venue. Dave got to the junction even before the time and waited for Martha. Martha, on the other hand, was held down by traffic and her battery suddenly went flat so she couldn't reach Dave to inform him she might be running late.

Minutes went by and Dave was becoming impatient. "Why do women act so stupidly? " He asked himself. "How can you keep someone waiting like this without a simple call? " His impatience was fast turning into anger. 

After about an hour, Martha arrived. "I'm so sorry... "

"Sorry for yourself! " Dave thundered.

"Why are you women so selfish? You think the world revolves around you? In fact, this stupid date is canceled! " 

Dave drove off angrily while Martha watched on in amazement, unable to utter a word...

He didn't call her. He showed up at her house two days later to apologize. With a rose flower. On one bent knee. She accepted his apology but didn't stop thinking. She was thinking if she was really doing the right thing. She decided to be more sensitive.

One day, she decided to show up at the youths' meeting where Dave was the head. Soon, she witnessed how Dave almost slapped a female member for not obeying one of the rules and for being rude afterward. He could have slapped her except he was restrained. Martha left unnoticed...

She knew the relationship had to end. Dave had anger issues. Theirs would be an abusive marriage. She wasn't ready to be a victim of domestic violence.

Not everyone in the church is perfectly ok, some are still receiving treatment. You can know the word and not act it. A successful relationship or marriage is not a product of two believers but of two believers who are willing to do the word of God.

Be wise 

By Tolulope Sobowale

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